I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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