I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
