She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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