people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Randomize
