Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
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That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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