i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
