They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
