Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
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