These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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