That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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