You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
