Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
