My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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