did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
