I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
