what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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