I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
