not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
