my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
