I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
