i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
