She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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