Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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