Sry I called you an 8
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
