He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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