I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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