Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize