Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
