Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
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