i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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