They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
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