Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
