3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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