My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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