Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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