did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I'm bleeding and have questions
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
