your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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