Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
