I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize
