She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
