South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
