I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
