Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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