"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
