i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
