Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
