I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Randomize
