She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
