whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
