Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
